I don’t know what to do with my hands when I talk to you,

you don’t know where to look, so you look at my hands.

Heute ein Supertag. I did it again. I rented a car and drove on the wrong side. Seriously, I really needed a long shower after that, makes you feel so dirty. What’s worse – driving on the left side of the road or child pornography? I don’t know. While we’re being childish, I must return for just a split second to Plimmerton. They have a rather huge gas stove/oven there. I think it is quite remarkable that even after so many years I still felt pretty akward when lighting that stove while there was a jewish couple in the same room. Ca suffit alors. Ich wollte an dieser Stelle eigentlich misantrophisches Gedankengut ueber Menschen, speziell natuerlich Frauen, verbreiten, aber der Tag war so gut, ich bringe nicht ausreichend negative Energie zusammen. Vielleicht kann ich ja meinen Bruder als Gastautor gewinnen? How’s it hangin‘ i Cali, bro? *g*

Back to topic. I’m in Motueka now, after leaving that dreadful boring Blenheim town on Wednesday. It sucked major arse. But at least I got a 2$ haircut and some clean trousers. When we drove into Motueka I instinctly disliked the town: there is a „Rudolf Steiner school“ right at the entrance and I fucking hate them people. All in all, there’s way too much hippies, artists, and „alternative people“ in general, if you know what I mean, in this region, especially in Takaka. But Motueka is a nice place anyway and a good base for Kahurangi National Park and Abel Tasman National Park. Just make sure you’ve got a car ‚cause otherwise you’re fucked. I drove up Takaka Hill aka „marble mountain“ today and did some cave exploring. For all the nerds among you, they shot some of the Moria scenes of LOTR in that cave. Ta-da. I continued north to Takaka, had a neither good nor bad piece of chocolate cake there (fucking hippies, can’t even cook right) and continued to Pupu Springs. There is a nice walkway there if you follow the gravel road for about 5k. Back then to Takaka summit, where there’s a track worth walking as well. you get to see some bizarre rock formations and landscape and the biggest cow I’ve ever seen in my life. Down the hill then and turn left to Kaiteriteri which sports a beautiful beach. I’ve never seen such colours before: the sand was truly golden, the water aryan blue, it looked like an extremely cheesy postcard sprung to life. Add to all this a couple of nice limestone cliffs and the fact that the beach was nearly empty, what more could you ask for? Right, not much, except some nice dinner and ice cream which I’m heading for right now, so it’s thank you and good night for today, see ya soon.

No so fast, Yakamoto! I’m inspector „There’s a man behind you“ from the Yard. You forgot to tell us about the hostel. Alright, it’s a fair cop, you got me there. Here we go: As mentioned before, Koanui Lodge in Blenheim was ok (please keep in mind that I always book twins or singles, i.e. the most expensive rooms, I can’t really tell whether dorms are just as good/bad or whatever), the staff a bit grumpy, but helpful. I dind’t like the people though, too young and too cool. I hope they all die. In Motueka it’s Hat Trick Lodge, which is highly recommendable. Towels, clean, spacious bath, good beds, nice staff. Don’t use their internet terminals though, they suck and just up the road is the best internet cafe I’ve seen in NZ so far (big screen, fast, Firefox). The kitchen is ok as well, could be a bit cleaner but that was due to too many people using it at the same time. Love, peace, and harmony. FOOD NOW!